Shit worth leaving your apartment for in San Francisco this week

Lookout, Castro

TODAY 12:00 PM • $10.38

“Drag illusionists, burlesque and live vocalists over brunch cocktails. Seatings at noon and 2.”

Kezar Pavilion, Haight-Ashbury

TODAY 4:00 PM • $66.50-$171

“Cage fighting at Kezar Pavilion: amateur and pro MMA, two world title fights on the card.”

Ferry Building Marketplace, FiDi

TMRW 10:00 AM • $48

“Caffeinate yourself into a higher plane. Hundreds of teas, one very long Sunday.”

Hotel Via, SoMa

TMRW 1:00 PM • $20-$40

“Stephan Jolk on Via's rooftop, 1-6pm, fully covered and heated. Sunday dancing before sunset.”

Shipyard Gallery at Hunters Point Shipyard, Other

TMRW 2:00 PM • $49.87

“No audience allowed on the pier, so they lit a Shipyard crane anyway. Hear how they pulled it off.”

Eclectic Box SF, Mission

MON 7:00 PM • $10-$40

“Show up, rehearse and perform a ten-minute staged reading with a one-day acting ensemble.”

The Abbey Tavern, Richmond

MON 8:00 PM • Free

“Free Monday stand-up in an Irish bar in the Richmond. Low stakes, high yield.”

Catharine Clark Gallery, Other

TUE 5:30 PM • $34-$82

“SF Opera players and Adler Fellows do chamber music inside an art gallery. Darkness Visible.”

Mother, Mission

TUE 6:00 PM • Free

“Queer line dancing for total beginners: two dances, some vocab, zero judgment. 21+, first come.”

Great American Music Hall, Tenderloin

TUE 8:00 PM • See Website

“Two 80s metal legends, one stage, denim and patches mandatory. No posers.”

The Riptide, Sunset

TUE 9:30 PM • Free

“Scream Black Flag at strangers in an Outer Sunset dive until 1am. Free.”

Goethe-Institut San Francisco, SoMa

WED 10:00 AM • Free

“50 years of punk between Kiel, Germany and San Francisco in photos and archives. Free, 10 to 4.”

Three Embarcadero Center, FiDi

WED 4:00 PM • Free

“17,000 lights flip on for the 40th year. First 400 in get a free drink or food voucher. Be early.”

The Church of Mother Gong, North Beach

WED 7:00 PM • Free

“A filthy 1988 NYC underground doc, screened free in a North Beach church”

The Valencia Room, Mission

WED 10:00 PM • Free

“Free 10pm Mission dance floor. Tomorrow-you can handle tomorrow.”

The Gregangelo Museum, Other

THU 1:00 PM • $75

“Home-cooked lunch, live music and the Forbidden Studios inside SF's weirdest art house.”

Leica Store San Francisco, FiDi

THU 5:00 PM • Free

“25 years of the Hamburger Eyes photo zine on the wall. Free opening, no ticket needed.”

Mr. Mahjong's, FiDi

THU 7:30 PM • $13

“Comedy in a bar called Mr. Mahjong's. Nobody tells you the lineup.”

Paris 75, North Beach

THU 8:00 PM • Free

“Live jazz, burlesque, zero cover. Broadway doing what Broadway does.”

Mechanics' Institute, FiDi

FRI 6:00 PM • $5-$10

“Starring Miss Stanwyck month: Ladies They Talk About (1933), fresh popcorn, lively discourse.”

Monument, SoMa

FRI 8:00 PM • $28.52

“Trash couture walks the runway in full camp glory. Shame is the raw material. Show at 8.”

The Chapel, Mission

FRI 8:00 PM • See Website

“Ex-purity-culture pop confessionals that'll wreck you then hug you. Cry-sing along.”

447 Minna, SoMa

FRI 9:00 PM • $12

“30 tiny plays in 60 minutes, order picked by the audience yelling numbers. Twelve bucks.”

Hedge Coffee, Mission

SAT 11:00 AM • See website

“DJs in a coffee shop on Shotwell, 11am to 5pm. Deep grooves, no hangover required.”

Great American Music Hall, Tenderloin

SAT 7:00 PM • See Website

“Just a guy, a piano, and every song you cried to in 2007. Bring tissues, leave dignity.”

Beaux, Castro

SAT 8:00 PM • $8

“Raven doing drag in the Castro for eight dollars. Get there before the line does.”

F8 1192 Folsom, SoMa

SAT 10:00 PM • $20-$29

“Rare SF stop for DJ Paypal and Cakedog: footwork, juke and Oakland's best on the undercard.”